


All The Constellations

by organic_galaxy



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Angst, FTM, Homecoming, Irondad, Spider-Man - Freeform, Trans, Transgender, Transpeterparker, spiderman - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-23
Updated: 2018-11-22
Packaged: 2019-07-16 05:12:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16079153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/organic_galaxy/pseuds/organic_galaxy
Summary: He needed to get to her, to tell her that everything was gonna be okay. That he was gonna get them out of there. But he was on the brink of collapsing, just like the building.“May! Please say something! I wanna know where you are.”“here-” her words were shortened by a cough.And now Spiderman ran. He ran faster than he thought he could.His whole body felt like it was burning and he almost couldn’t breathe. But he had to run. He had to save her.A fire, a death, a hero.





	1. In Which A Fire Appears

**Author's Note:**

> P L E A S E listen to Uranus (instrumental) by Sleeping At Last while reading this, I promise you it makes the experience much better (or worse, it depends on how you look at it)

The fire was all over the news.

Someone had set a bomb in the hospital and somehow it started burning. Bad.

At first, Peter thought that he shouldn’t let Spiderman help them. Simply because he wasn’t able to do anything about the fire.   
But then the camera zoomed in on one of the rooms where May Parker was standing with a bunch of hospitalized children, all caught in the fire and his heart stopped.

The next thing Peter knew, he was rushing through the city of Queens in his Spiderman suit, trying to get there before it was too late.

 

When he finally got to the hospital, the first thing he did was to rush to the part of the building that he last saw his aunt. 

He came flying in through one of the windows, causing some of the kids to scream.

The room was burning hot (haha, pun) and it was hard for Spiderman to breathe, but he had to find his Aunt May. 

But as he was about to stand up and find her, a small kid hugged his leg. “Please help me, Spiderman! it hurts.” He could barely hear what the kid was yelling because of the flames, but the tears rolling down his cheeks and the terrified look on his face told it all. He needed his mother as well.

 

“It’s okay, I’ll help you out!” was all he could say. he had to save the kids. Or else someone might feel as bad as he did when he lost someone who meant the whole world to him.

He ran over to the window, removed some of the shattered glass and made a slide out of his fluids. He then took the coughing child and made him slide down. 

 

The flames were even bigger now, almost like it was angry at Spiderman for trying to save innocent children. “Everyone! This way!” He could only wish for his voice to be big enough for the other kids to hear. Fortunately, the kids heard his yell and crawled over to the window.

He asked one of the kids if they knew where May Parker was, and to Spiderman’s fright, she said that she went to save some of the other people.

Spiderman ran into the rest of the hospital, determined to find his aunt.

 

“Maaaay! May Parker!” he yelled desperately in the hopes of an answer, but he didn’t get any words in return. The longer he walked, the harder it became for him to breathe. The hospital was slowly collapsing, and the only thing Spiderman could do was watch. “Maaaaaaaaay! Please!” 

“... Peter?!”

“May!” 

and so, he ran.

He needed to get to her, to tell her that everything was gonna be okay. That he was gonna get them out of there. But he was on the brink of collapsing, just like the building. 

“May! Please say something! I wanna know where you are.”

“here-” her words were shortened by a cough. 

And now Spiderman ran. He ran faster than he thought he could. 

His whole body felt like it was burning and he almost couldn’t breathe. But he had to run. He had to save her.

 

He found May lying on the floor, coughing like crazy. “Omg! May!”

“Please help” he could almost not hear her voice anymore.

He ran, picked May up and carried her to the window.

Spiderman broke the window and jumped out of it, carrying his loving aunt in his arms, prepared to take the fall.

 

The fall took his breath for five seconds, but after that all he did was ache. His aunt was more important.

“Are you okay?” he asked May, who had moved off Spiderman’s body after he took the fall.

“Peter, what on earth were you thinking!” She was still laying down, her voice weaker than usual.

“I saw you on the news and knew I had to-” He paused for a second and sat up in chock. “Wait, how do you know it was me?”

May coughed. “I’ve known for some time now. I’m so proud of you,” Peter could see a tear running down her face. “you’re out there every day, saving lives. Ben would be so proud of you.” 

Peter didn’t realize he was crying until he tried to talk. “I- I know.”

He paused for a moment. 

“We have to get you to an ambulance. Please stay, please stay here, I’ll get-”

“It’s too late, Peter. I can feel it.” 

“nononononono, don’t you dare say that! Not yet, Not yet!!” May put her hand on Peters.

“I love you so much. please take care of yourself.”

Peters' eyes were filled with tears. He could barely even hold himself awake, but he had to. He had to stay with Aunt May until someone would come save her.

“Peter, I’m so sorry you had to-” coughs broke her sentence.

“To go through all this. I love you so so so much!”

“Don’t- you’re not gonna die. I’m gonna save you! I promise!”

He held her hand and squeezed it.

“I’m not giving up on you. Please-” 

Her grip was getting weaker and weaker

“promise me that you’re gonna keep your grades up,”

“please stay awake. Please!”

“Come here,” she said and Peter laid on her chest, listening to her heartbeat. He always did it when he was younger and had nightmares. He had fallen asleep on her like that countless times.

“I love you. You’re my son.”

“I know, May. Please stay!” 

“I’m sorry, Pete. I’m not a good mom-”

She coughed again, making Peter sob.

“I love you.”

Her heartbeat stopped.

 

A scream

An “Omg Spiderman, are you okay?”

A hug that wasn’t returned by a mom

A “your heart rate is going too fast, Peter.”

A stranger’s hand touching his shoulder

An “I’m notifying Stark.”

A shaking and sobbing superhero

A sound of Iron Man’s motors

A pull away from the dead body

Another scream, begging “no, please!”s

A flight in Tony’s arms.

  
  


Cries and screams

“This can’t be real”

“she isn’t  _ dead _ ”

“It’s just a bad dream”

“It should have been me.”

“IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME!”

more cries and sobs, followed by sleep.


	2. In Which Peter Wakes Up Confused

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Peter wakes up in a way too known room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there's an important message in the endnotes!! Please read it, it'll affect the story depending on which you choose.

Waking up wasn’t a hard thing to do.  
When Peter opened his eyes and looked around, he saw that he was in one of the spare bedrooms in the Avengers compound. But what he didn’t expect was for his teddy bear Anna to be sitting next to him.  
As he sat up, he saw even more of his stuff laying on the floor. Backpack, computer, books, clothes, and the old picture frame with a picture of his uncle Ben and aunt May sitting with him, all smiling. Like none of them was dead.  
Oh god. Aunt May!

“Good morning, Peter.” A robotic voice came from a hiding speaker.  
“Good morning, Friday.” His voice told everything about how tired he was. Even though he had probably slept for several hours, he still felt like he had been awake for days, if not weeks.  
“I am informing Tony Stark of your awakening.”  
He nodded, realized that Friday, a robot, probably wasn’t able to see his nod, and answered “okay.” instead.  
“Do you know why all my things are here?” He got up from the bed, put Anna on his pillow, and went to look inside his backpack. Where was his Spiderman costume? Had Mr. Stark taken it?  
“Tony Stark wants you to go to the kitchen.”

When he entered the kitchen, his nose was filled with the smell of pancakes and other sugary stuff.  
“That took some time,” Tony mumbled. He was standing in the kitchen, trying to make pancakes. When Peter stepped in, his focus went from the pancakes to the boy.“Did you sleep well?” Peter stood still for a moment, taking in the view of the Iron Man to be making pancakes in the middle of the morning like a normal person. “uhh… yeah. Yeah, I did.” The awkward silence fell again for a few seconds. Tony really wanted Peter to feel home, to be comfortable. But how the hell do you do such a thing when the kid just lost the last of his family?

“You should probably take a shower before eating. You smell like burnt toast.” Peter ran his hand awkwardly through his hair. “Yeah …can you tell me why all my stuff is here?”  
“oh.” Tony paused and flipped another pancake. “I thought it would be nice for you to wake up next to them? You also have to stay here for some time, so…”  
“Why?”  
They both knew the answer, but Peter needed to hear it out loud. Why couldn’t he go home? Because his aunt is dead? Because he is basically all alone in the world? Or maybe because Mr. Stark … cared?  
Tony’s eyes flickered away. Feelings weren’t exactly his specialty. Especially when it was about death and loss. He would usually just crack a joke or pretend that everything was fine, but it wasn’t. He knew that May was the last person that Peter had left.

After the fight with Steve, Tony started his research on the kid. He had to know everything he could about the teenager with strange powers. When he found out that he was fifteen, he was shocked. Such power at that age? It sounded impossible! But he was even more shocked when he saw that Peter had basically lost everything. He couldn’t get much information about his parents, not even their names. But what he did find was that they both died when Peter was around eight, later to be followed by his uncle Ben Parker at the age of 14. Tony didn’t see any of the loss in the boy when they had first met. But as he slowly got to know the kid, he started seeing it; the loneliness and exhaustion. Of course, Peter would be tired from all the fighting like spider-man, but it wasn’t that kind of tired. When he was out fighting crime, he was always a bundle of joy, but when the mask got off you could see the lines under his faded, green eyes. He couldn’t find much about his childhood, but he didn’t seem to care. Tony thought that if there was ever anything special about his childhood that he had to know, then he would probably tell him. No need to worry, right?

“Because…” Tony couldn’t come up with an answer good enough. There wasn’t. Not without hurting the shit out of him.  
Silence fell again. The only thing you could hear in the room was the pancakes getting burned, but Tony didn’t care about them right now. There were other things to help. Other people.

“I gotta do my homework.” Peter mumbled and went inside his room again. 

Tony wanted him to stay, but he knew it was no good. “Do you want a pancake with you?”  
No answer.

The door to Peter’s room and both the heroes breathed out. Neither of them in a positive way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter! I just felt stuck so I wanted to finish this and start again in the new episode.  
> Also Important! I really wanna make Peter trans in this story, but I'm afraid people won't like it?? So if you have an opinion on whether he should be trans in this fic or not, please comment on it!  
> If he's trans it's gonna get funnier in the story and probably easier to write since I can base it on my own experience, but it really does depend on the readers.


	3. In Which They Have A Not-So-Nice Conversation

Peter had a lot of secrets. When he was around 14 he found out that he was trans, and a few weeks after he came out, he got bitten by the spider. When his uncle Ben was murdered he chose to never let it happen to anyone else. Never again.

But keeping all these secrets also had its consequences. He couldn’t speak with his aunt about being Spider-man, and there was no one else who understood the struggles of dysphoria. Aunt May tried really hard to understand what being transgender was, and she even bought him a binder for his birthday and helped him choose a name. It was her who suggested that he could use Benjamin for his middle name to get closer to his uncle. But it still felt like he was too far away from the rest of the world.

The only person in Midtown High who knew about him being trans was Ned. He felt bad not telling Ned because he told Peter everything. But when he became Spider-man he had to hide it so that Ned wouldn’t get in danger. Which went … not so well.

But coming out to Tony Stark? The man who Peter should live with maybe for the rest of his life? Would he even let him live in the Avengers compound or would he let some stranger adopt him? And would it even be a good idea for Mr. Stark to adopt a child? The words would get out and people would get suspicious and start asking questions or making theories about why. What if they found out that Peter was Spider-man? Or what if Mr. Stark found out that Peter wasn’t born Peter?

Did any of it even matter?

Peter turned off the shower. Maybe he should wait till things got less confusing.

When he opened his closet he found more of his clothes hanging there. It looked like someone had cleaned it and ironed it. But why?  
He put on some clothes, including a sweater with the words “Space was cool before it mattered” on it.

The room was still a mess, so he decided to clean it up.

Clothes in the closet, backpack against the wall close to his bed, books on top of each other next to his backpack.  
Then he looked at the picture frame that was laying on the floor, smiling happily at him. But it didn’t make him happy to look at. He took it up, feeling the old wood around the semi-dusty glass that protected the picture. The picture frame was better at protecting the people Peter loved better than he ever did.

A sudden knock on the door chocked Peter, making him drop the picture frame.

Mr. Stark opened the door to see Peter looking at the broken glass on the floor with a face that was hard to decipher. Was it sadness? Anger? Or was there even any feelings inside of him?  
“Need some help?” Peter looked up at the billionaire. His eyes looked like they had been dead for a while. He shook his head and went to grab the glass pieces on the floor.

“Well, I wanted to ask you what kind of pizza you like? We can get something else if you want to-”

"Why am I here?"

The words chocked Stark. What should he say? Your aunt is dead and you have nowhere to go so I’m gonna take care of you until you know what you want to do?  
“Look,” Mr. Stark said and walked over and sat down on Peter’s new bed. He patted the bed and Peter dropped the glass in his hand to sit next to him.  
The man sighed.

  
“I didn’t think this was how I was gonna spend my Saturday after day, and I doubt that you thought about this either. But now you’re here.” He took a small pause to think about how he should answer the hard question. Tony Stark didn't have any social skills, not even to mention talking about emotions. But he had to. He had to make Peter feel better in some way, even if it meant telling the truth. But what came out of his mouth wasn't as full of feelings and support as he wanted it to.  
“I took you here because you needed to sleep. What you do afterward is your choice.”  
There was a short silence once again. Tony had said it in a harsh voice. Like he didn't care. Peter mumbled the words “It’s my fault she died.” And then Stark saw his mistakes.  
“You need to stop saying everything is your fault. Because it’s not. Your aunt died a hero. She decided to help, just like you do when you’re out as Spider-man.”  
“I watched the fire on the news, thinking that I shouldn’t do anything. I only wanted to help when I saw May! If I came earlier then this wouldn’t have happened! May would still be…” Peter let out a quiet sob.

Tony put his arms around the kid. He didn’t want Peter to put such a big responsibility on his own shoulders. It’s unfair, especially if you counted his age into it.

They stayed like that for some time. Peter’s sobs had turned into cries. He was shaking and hugging Stark. That was really all he needed right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING! I swear a bit here.
> 
> The story of why I wanted to make this fanfiction is actually kinda funny.
> 
> So there I sat, an ugly teenager, reading fanfictions instead of doing homework or sleep like a normal 16-year old. But all these fanfictions made me angry because they were always the same.  
> Aunt May dies for some unknown reason, Mr. Stark adopts Peter and then he suddenly drops the "I am a superhero" thing to beat the shit out of Flash who is such a huge dick he's not even a human being in any kind of way.  
> Peter forgets that his aunt is dead and lives his life happily with his new dad Tony Stark. Also, he calls Mr. Stark dad because he totally did that to his uncle Ben, too, when he was alive.
> 
> Oh, and also he's trans, and the only kind of dysphoria he has is about b00bies and his voice. Nothing else.  
> Then he comes out to Mr. Stark (aka dad for some reason) and Mr. Stark knows everything about being trans. They go outside, some idiot chooses to call him her and Mr. Stark, once again, puts away his "I am a superhero" thing to beat this person up, typically only with words though.
> 
> This 16-year old kid is tired of this stuff and thinks "what if I wrote a story about Spider-man that was also bad but I wrote it so at least it fits what I wanted to see?"
> 
> So yeah, that's the story of my life.  
> Sorry for taking your time


	4. In Which Peter Eats A Lot Of Pizza

After Peter had stopped crying, they started talking about what type of food they wanted. They had settled on pepperoni pizza.  
Stark didn’t want to admit that it was nice not sitting alone in a cold lab.  
But the truth was there, hiding somewhere.  
They had sat in the sofas, eating pizza and drinking cola while watching the new movie about Han Solo’s past. Peter had explained a lot about what was happening and who the people were to Stark, who pretended that he didn’t know anything about the universe. But he had watched all the movies because of Peter. He wanted to be able to understand the kid more.

Peter always talked about the movies. Whether it was in puns, fighting strategies or him and Ned’s LEGO obsession. He had talked a lot about how he and Ned had planned on buying the whole LEGO collection and build it. So far they had the death star, a big millennium plane thing, and an old Bionicle-looking version of Darth Vader that Peter had found in a secondhand shop while looking for clothes with his aunt and uncle. In conclusion: The kid really loved Star Wars.

Unfortunately, the movie ended and they had both ate their pizzas. Tony didn’t know Peter was such a fast eater, but he was a growing teenager, who also had crazy powers, so it shouldn’t have surprised him as much as it did.

“Hey uhh…” Peter mumbled. “is it okay if I uhh, if I go out for some time?” His eyes didn’t meet Mr. Stark’s even though you could sense it was what Mr. Stark wanted them to.  
“Are you asking me if you’re allowed to go out as Peter or Spiderman?”  
“It’s actually spider-man. With a hyphen.” Mr. Stark let out a small giggle.  
“Of course it’s okay, kid. Just be home before 3 am, okay?”  
Peter jumped out of the sofa, almost too excited about doing something he has done for over a year now. “Really!?”  
“Yeah. Now skedaddle before I take it back.” Peter jumped a few times and then ran into his room, ready to go out and ‘save the world’ as he liked to call it. It was just like what Aunt May had once said. “help someone and you help everyone”.

Peter went by that a lot. By doing small things like helping old ladies by carrying their heavy bags or talk with a kid who was crying on the street would he bring hope and get remembered. And that was all he really wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo!  
> Sorry for the short chapter, I just felt like ending it on one page.  
> I've written four chapters on nine pages so far and I'm pretty proud!
> 
> Sometimes when I read something I always think "I would've put more details here" and stuff like that, and I was thinking what if people think the same with my stories?  
> Said in another way, I would love it if you tell me what works and what doesn't. What needs more or fewer details and such. It would make my life so much better aaaaaaa!
> 
> Okay, I'm done. Happy whatever it is at the time you're reading this!


	5. In Which Spidey Rambles A Lot

Spider-man was swinging around the city, looking for people who needed help. He was quietly singing along to Walking The Wire by Imagine Dragons that was playing in his headphones. It was so awesome that Mr. Stark had put headphones in his suit. The man really did put everything in there as he said!   
But he had to change a few web settings because it didn’t always fit his needs. He couldn’t complain though, because Mr. Stark had done so much for him.

Being out as Spider-man helped him think about something else. He had to focus on helping others instead of taking care of his own feelings. And that was all he needed right now. No mourning, just being a stupid teenager, doing stupid teenage stuff like dressing up in spandex and beating up bad guys. 

As you do.

As he swung by a building, he heard someone say “Oh come on, beautiful! Don’t you wanna come home and have a great time?” Spider-man stuck to a building and looked at what was happening before entering.

“No thank you!” The lady yelled at the man who stood about five meters away with some friends. They clearly didn’t know each other. “Please just let me-”   
“You look so hot with those heels! Come on, do a guy a favor!”   
Peter couldn’t handle it anymore.

He jumped down to the lady and started talking.  
“Hey, friend! I love your dress! Red suits you so well!”  
“Spiderman?!”   
“Well, it’s actually Spider-man. You know, with a hyphen?”   
“Oh uh sorry?”   
“‘s fine! Totally fine! So uh where are you going?”  
The woman smiled. “I’m going home. Can you maybe follow me? The dude over there is yelling disgusting things and it’s getting kinda uncomfortable,”  
“Yeah, sure!” Spider-man said happily while nodding. And thus, she showed him the way.

“So have you seen How I Met Your Mother? I love it! I can’t wait for the day I’ll be able to use the olive test!”  
The lady looked like she was about to die. How old is this kid??  
“Well, no, I haven’t seen it.” She then answered, causing Spider-man to stop walking.   
“Dude, you should totally watch it! I can explain you the first episode if you want?” The woman didn’t even get time to answer before Spider-man continued.  
“Okay, so it starts with this man telling his two kids how he met their mother and then-”

Time passed by and Spider-man had explained two whole episodes in extreme details when they stood before the door to her apartment. “Thank you, Spider-man. It was … something.”  
“You’re so very welcome! I’m sorry those dudes had to be like that.”  
“It’s okay,” She muttered. “Men are always like that. You get used to it.”  
“Oh …”   
“Yeah. Well, I’ll get inside now.” She then said and opened the door.  
Spider-man started waving goodbye, regretted it instantly and took his hand down. The brown door slammed closed and the woman was gone. 

“Well,” He then started mumbling to himself.   
“Let’s see if anyone else needs help.”

He ran into an alley, crawled up the wall and went to the top so that he could jump and let his fluids take him the next place he had to go.  
“Hey, Karen?” He yelled, being unable to hear his own voice because of the wind in his ears. “Yes, Spider-man?” The A.I answered immediately.   
“Can you tell me when it’s 2:30 am? I have to be back home then.”   
“Of course. Should I send May Parker a message when you’re coming home?” 

Peter went blank. Of course, the AI didn’t know it yet.

Maybe if Karen sends the message May would wake up and get the message? Maybe she’ll come back? All Peter wanted to do was hug her tightly and tell her how much he misses her. They could go back home and watch trash tv, laughing at the unnecessary drama that they always have. He could talk with her about what’s been going on at school and she would tell him how proud she is of him. She would try to cook something for them to eat but always mess it up because she never follows the recipes. The whole apartment always smelled like burnt food because of this. But they would eat it anyway, and Peter would tell her how she almost nailed it this time and she would give her the I know you mean it ironically and for that, you’re so dead but I’ll take the compliment look and they’ll both understand and laugh about it. Peter would after that go into his room and do his homework and call Ned over Skype. They’ll talk about the newest Star Wars theories and Ned would make tons of Vine references and Peter would use tons of puns. Sometimes, Aunt May would come into the room to tell them that all the puns make her crazy and they’ll answer her with even more puns and jokes, and they’ll laugh. She will hug Peter, kiss him on the cheek and tell him that she loves him. And he will say that he loves her even more. And everything would be alright

But that time is gone forever. It will never happen again. Ever.   
He is all alone now and it hurts.  
A lot.

“Um no, you uh..” Peter threw his hand out, making his web machine sense his movement and push the web out of it. The fluid grabbed a building and swung Peter up into the air again. “Don’t tell anyone I’m coming.”

Maybe he shouldn’t be out anymore. Maybe he shouldn’t have gone out today. Maybe he should just stay inside forev-   
“PLEASE DON’T SHOOT!!”

Peter started swinging towards the sound. He had to help.


	6. A Playlist!

RUNNING ‘ROUND THE CITY   
\- a playlist by Peter Parker

Ain’t no rest for the wicked by Cage The Elephant

Don’t Stop by Foster The People

A-Punk by Vampire The Weekend

Light Me Up by Bronze Radio Return

Tongue Tied by Grouplove

Walking The Wire by Imagine Dragons

Fluorescent Adolescent by Arctic Monkeys

Mess Around by Cage The Elephant

Dancing Song by Little Comets


End file.
